What's Your Bedroom Personality? (For Her)
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Damsels are hard to find in a modern world with screwy ideals! You're probably a romantic and you might even have a broken heart because, SURPRISE! The world isn't a fairy tale. I'm not saying you should change because that would be awful. Stick to your guns, be patient, and wait for that godamned prince-metaphor to come because, damnit, you deserve royalty and not some second-rate wannabe.

yeah, shoo off