Thursday, July 31, 2003


Dear [name of a boy],

It has come to my attention that you have been selected as a potential
student of ACS(I). We are indeed pleased to welcome you to our big family.
However, there are a few improvements that have to be made for you to be
qualified to be one of us.

Firstly, your physical appearance needs alteration. According to our
school's tradition, our attire includes:

1. spiked hair
2. pants worn on the hips
3. almost completely hidden socks
4. shirts not tucked in properly etc.

Furthermore, you must have bushy eyebrows and tan skin to be eligible. Thus,
we would appeal that you make this changes ASAP.

Secondly, other than outward appearance, what goes on inside is crucial as
well. We adhere struictly to our 3 acts: Act Cool, Act Attitude and Act
Poser, stressing on poser-ism as the basis of our image.

Act cool: All ACSI students are required to be adept in pretending to be
cool in the way bimbos will fall for the trick, even though it is obviously
not the proper definition of "cool". We do not want our students to be cool
but to ACT cool. This will include mannerisms like acting nonchalant and
pompous that will create the false impression that ACSI guys are indeed very
desirable and good looking.

Act attitude: Due to the fact that bimbos absolutely love attitudal guys, we
emphasise strongly on pretending to have attitude in our boys. You will
hence have to act like a very bad person when you are in fact an insecure
and deprived person.

Act poser: AS this is the trademark of our school, it will require no
further explanation.

To adhere to our school's motto "The best is yet to be", we require you to
stop getting good results in school especially in the area of literature, as
this opposes our motto. You will hence need to go out more with bimbos, have
fun, screw around and be less concerned with your studies.

Your Chinese grades need to be extremely poor and you will have to hate it a
lot. In other words, you must forget all your roots and be a perfect banana.
You are also required to be rich to avoid being ostracised and looked down
upon in our school. More emphasis will also be put on sports to create the
false impression that ACSI guys are all rounders.

We look forward to your joining our huge ACS family and we certainly do
believe you have the potential, judging by your bimbo attracting qualities
prevalent in all our students. We believe that with more posing, despising
Chinese and acting, you can definitely be an outstanding representation of

yours sincerely,
Ong Teck Chin
Anglo Chinese School (Independent)

Saturday, July 26, 2003

I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......

* she called me to get my phone number.

* she spent 20 minutes looking at the orange juice box because it said "concentrate."

* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

*she tried to drown a fish.

*she thought a quarterback was a refund.

*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

*she tripped over a cordless phone.

*she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

*she asked for a price check at the Dollar Store.

*she studied for a blood test.

*she thought Meow Mix was a CD for cats.

*when she heard that 90% of all crimes occur around the home, she moved.

*when she missed the 44 bus, she took the 22 bus twice instead.

*when she took you to the airport and saw a sign that said "Airport Left" she turned around and went home

Friday, July 25, 2003

Blood Groups Analysis

GROUP O: they can't stand people who hide the truth

Basic Behaviour:
Make objectives clear
Posses great deal of confidence.
They are honest, optimistic and energetic

Their strength and endurance depend on their aim.
They can give up easily when they find a job meaningless.

How do they see their future and past:
They are positive about their past thus they normally don't regret about their past.
They seek financial stability for the future.

How do they express their emotion:
They are usually stable and calm
But they are very sensitive towards sincerity.
They give straightforward opinions

How do they work:
Their concentration varies from time to time depending on their aim
They mostly prefer to lead
They tend to overlook details

GROUP A: they are pessimistic and too sensitive

Basic Behaviour:
Be very careful about decision making.
Make things clear in black and white.
Care too much about social rules and standard

Has high tolerance regardless of physical of repetitious work
Can't take frequent changes easily
Can easily lose interest in their hobby

How do they see their future and past:
They must try very hard to forget about their past.
They are pessimistic about their future.

How do they express their emotion:
They are able to display a cool outlook even when they are angry
They are actually quite short-tempered.
They need a longer time to heal a broken heart.
They are too sensitive towards other's opinions.

How do they work:
They are perfectionist
They handle one thing at a time
They draw a lien between work and personal affairs
They are highly responsible people
When they choose a hobby they tent to choose one that will release stress.

GROUP B: they can't take orders easily

Basic Behaviour:
Make decision fast
Can be flexible
Don't care about rules
Respect scientific and practical finding

Maintain the longest interest in whatever they do
Seem to be impatient
Can't stand repetitious work

How do they see their future and past:
It is hard for them to let go recent affairs. But they are able to forget about their past bad memories.
They are optimistic about their future.

How do they express their emotion:
They are very expressive
They can be a cool and objective
Although they joke a great deal, they are actually very shy.
They change their mood like weather.
They can't stop complaining then they get angry.

How do they work:
They are full of creativity and posses many new ideas
They can't differentiate between work and hobby
They can't take orders
They will not hesitate to introduce innovative change and are not worry about others critics

GROUP AB: they are romantic and sentimental

Basic Behaviour:
Be extremely practical
Can be excellent analyst
Give fair criticisms
Can't decide when it comes to important issues.

Try to be hard working
Can be quite impatient.

How do they see their future and past:
They are sometimes sentimental towards there past.
They are more concern about their immediate problem than anything else

How do they express their emotion:
They are sentimental
They are usually cool and steady. But they can get upset coz of an immediate problem bugging them
Some get moody easily.

How do they work:
They have ability to handle a wide scope of job
They value hard work
They are quick in understanding
They are not very responsible and unable to follow-up till a job is completed.
They posses good sense of art.

Thursday, July 24, 2003

Guess the words:

1. man

Ans. = man overboard

2. stand

Ans. = I understand

OK?....get the hang of it? Let's try a few now & see how you fare?

3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/

Ans. = reading between the lines

4. r

Ans. = cross road

5. cycle

Ans. = tricycle

6. t

Ans. = downtown

7. le /
/ vel

Ans. = split level

8 0

Ans. = two degrees below zero

9. knee

Ans. = neon light (knee-on-light)

10. ii ii

Ans. = circles under the eyes

11. cover

Ans. = undercover cop

12. dice

Ans. = paradise

13. t

Ans. = touchdown

14. ground

Ans. = six feet underground

15. he's / himself

Ans. = he's by himself

16. ecnalg

Ans. = backward glance

17. death / life

Ans. = life after death


Ans. think big !!

19. going

Ans. Going overseas

And the last one is.............. see if you can guess this !!!

20. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb....

Ans. long time, no c (see)

Wednesday, July 23, 2003

Read Slowly...

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most?
Saying something and wishing you hadn't?, or
Saying nothing and wishing you had?

I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say.Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them.

If you do, they might break your heart...if you don't, you might break theirs.

Have u ever decided not 2 become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person?

Your heart decides whom it likes and whom it doesn't.
You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own........when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you?

Too many of us stay walled up because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or even at all.

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle?

We tell lies when we are afraid... afraid of what we
don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us.

But every time we tell a lie, the thing we fear grows stronger.

Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump.

Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have done, or could have had.

* What would you do if every time you fell in love you had to say good-bye?

*What would you do if every time you wanted someone they would never be there?

*What would you do if your best friend died tomorrow and you never got to tell them how you felt? (even if it is that you don't care anymore)

*What would you do if you loved someone more than ever and you couldn't have them?

*What would you do if you never got the chance to say I am friends with all of my family and they know I love them?*

People live, but people die. I want to tell you that
you are a friend.

If you died tomorrow (God Forbid)

you would bein my heart.
Would I be in yours?

Sunday, July 20, 2003

...Humans are Stupid??

1. Only in America .......can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

2. Only in America .......are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

3. Only in America drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

4. Only in America people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

5. Only in America banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

6. Only in America we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.

7. Only in America we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.

8. Only in America we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight. (THIS ONE ALWAYS BUGGED ME!)

9. Only in America we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'.

10. Only in America they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.


Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why is it that to stop Windows 98, you have to click on "Start"?

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new and improved tasting, who tests it?

Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?

If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. ( and that's the only time I have to work on my hair.)

On a bag of Fritos: ...You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (the shoplifter special?)

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (and that would be how??...)

On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (but, it's "just" a suggestion.)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (well...duh, a bit late, huh!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (...and you thought????...)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (but wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:"Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (and... I'm taking this because???....)

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (as opposed to...what?)

On Sunsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (talk about a news flash)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts. (Step 3: maybe, Delta?)

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly." (I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)

Wednesday, July 16, 2003

Christy, your emotions are triggered by your underlying belief in Integrity

In other words, your uncompromisingly honest nature directly affects how, and how often, you experience certain feelings.

For example, your test results indicate that you're most fulfilled when you hold fast to your moral ideals. That factor is directly related to your fundamental belief in integrity and the range of emotions it triggers.

Based on your belief in integrity, where do you rank in the emotional landscape? Which of your emotions dominate your life? And how can you learn to control your emotions?

91% of test takers also believe integrity is important.
Because of your uncompromising integrity, you generally feel most fulfilled when you hold fast to your moral ideals. In most situations you feel as if there's a pretty clear sense of right and wrong and you do your best never to choose the wrong path, even if it's easier or faster. People watch your actions and seek your opinions when it comes to difficult situations because they see you as someone brave enough to uphold your values and they believe yours are good. Your emotional intolerance for immorality �in yourself and others �makes you a highly virtuous person.

Here's an example to illustrate what we mean: Jane's strongest belief is also integrity. It's not hard to imagine that when Jane's co-worker let her in on his plan to skim money off the top of their company's profits, she was pretty shocked. As his motivation, he cited their employer's recent reduction in benefits and the fact that they hadn't received a raise in three years, but none of his justifications swayed Jane. Because she has such a deep belief in the value of integrity, all of her emotions about the experience were heightened. She felt appalled by her co-worker's plan and dismayed by his inferior ethics. She reminded him that their employer had made many of the cutbacks as a strategy to avoid laying anyone off during the dry spell. And because she refused to be in any way a part of the money-skimming plan �even by just knowing about it and letting it happen �she informed him that if he went ahead with it, she'd have no choice but to expose the discrepancies in the books. Jane felt comfortable with her approach because she was putting the decision back in her co-worker's hands, and informing him of the consequences ahead of time, which she felt was the best way to maintain her integrity.

What's Behind Your Emotions?


I ran into a stranger as he passed by, "Oh excuse me please" was my reply. He said, "Please excuse me too; I wasn't watching for you." We were very polite, this stranger and I. We went on our way and we said good-bye. But at home a different story is told, how we treat our loved ones, young and old.
Later that day, cooking the evening meal, my son stood beside me very still. When I turned, I nearly knocked him down. "Move out of the way," I said with a frown. He walked away, his little heart broken. I didn't realize how harshly I'd spoken. While I lay awake in bed, God's still small voice came to me and said, "While dealing with a stranger, common courtesy you use, but the children you love, you seem to abuse. Go and look on the kitchen floor, You'll find some flowers there by the door. Those are the flowers he brought for you. He picked them himself: pink, yellow and blue. He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise, you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes."
By this time, I felt very small, And now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by his bed; "Wake up, little one, wake up," I said. "Are these the flowers you picked for me?" He smiled, "I found 'em, out by the tree. I picked 'em because they're pretty like you. I knew you'd like 'em, especially the blue." I said, "Son, I'm very sorry for the way I acted today; I shouldn't have yelled at you that way " He said, "Oh, Mom, that's okay. I love you anyway." I said, "Son, I love you too, and I do like the flowers, especially the blue."

Are you aware that if we died tomorrow, the company that we are working for could easily replace us in a matter of days. But the family we left behind will feel the loss for the rest of their lives. And to think of it, we pour ourselves more into work than into our own family, an unwise investment indeed, don't you think? So what is behind the story?

Do you know what the word FAMILY means?

Friday, July 11, 2003

90/10 Principle

For those who are familiar with the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey, this article makes me relate to one of the principles i.e. "Begin with the end in mind". Read on and be blessed.

Have you read this before?

Discover the 90/10 Principle. It will change your life (at least the way you react to situations)

What is this principle?

10% of life is made up of what happens to you. 90% of life is decided by how you react. What does this mean? We really have no control over 10% of what happens to us. We cannot stop the car from breaking down. The plane will be late arriving, which throws our whole schedule off. A driver may cut us off in traffic. We have no control over this 10%. The other 90% is different. You determine the other 90%.


By your reaction. You cannot control a red light. but you can control your reaction. Don't let people fool you; YOU can control how you react. Let's use an example.

You are eating breakfast with your family.

Your daughter knocks over a cup of coffee onto your business shirt.

You have no control over what just what happened. What happens next will be determined by how you react.

You curse.
You harshly scold your daughter for knocking the cup over.
She breaks down in tears.
After scolding her, you turn to your spouse and criticize her for placing the cup too close to the edge of the table.
A short verbal battle follows.
You storm upstairs and change your shirt.
Back downstairs, you find your daughter has been too busy crying to finish breakfast and get ready for school.
She misses the bus.

Your spouse must leave immediately for work.
You rush to the car and drive your daughter to school.
Because you are late, you drive 40 miles an hour in a 30 mph speed limit.
After a 15-minute delay and throwing $60 (traffic fine) away, you arrive at school.
Your daughter runs into the building without saying goodbye. After arriving at the office 20 minutes late, you find you forgot your briefcase.

Your day has started terrible. As it continues, it seems to get worse and worse. You look forward to coming home, When you arrive home, you find small wedge in your relationship with your spouse and daughter.

Because of you reacted in the morning.

Why did you have a bad day?
A) Did the coffee cause it?

B) Did your daughter cause it?

C) Did the policeman cause it?

D) Did you cause it?

The answer is D.

You had no control over what happened with the coffee. How you reacted in those 5 seconds is what caused your bad day.

Here is what could have and should have happened.

Coffee splashes over you.
Your daughter is about to cry.

You gently say, �ts ok honey, you just need to be more careful next time".
Grabbing a towel you rush upstairs.
After grabbing a new shirt and your briefcase, you come back down in time to look through the window and see your child getting on the bus.
She turns and waves.
You and your spouse kiss before you go to work.
You arrive 5 minutes early and cheerfully greet the staff.

Your boss comments on how good the day you are having.

Notice the difference?

Two different scenarios. Both started the same. Both ended different.


Because of how you REACTED. You really do not have any control over 10% of what happens. The other 90% was determined by your reaction.

Here are some says to apply the 90/10 principle. If someone says something negative about you, don't be a sponge.

Let the attack roll off like water on glass. You don't have to let the negative comments affect you! React properly and it will not ruin your day. A wrong reaction could result in losing a friend, being fired, getting stressed out etc.

How do you react if someone cuts you off in traffic?

Do you lose your temper?
Pound on the steering wheel? (A friend of mine had the steering wheel fall off)
Do you curse?

Does your blood pressure skyrocket?
Do you try and bump them?
WHO CARES if you arrive ten seconds later at work?
Why let the cars ruin your drive?
Remember the 90/10 principle, and do not worry about it.

You are told you lost your job.

Why lose sleep and get irritated?

It will work out. Use your worrying energy and time into finding another job.
The plane is late; it is going to mangle your schedule for the day. Why take out your frustration on the flight attendant? She has no control over what is going on. Use your time to study, get to know the other passenger. Why get stressed out? It will just make things worse.

Now you know the 90-10 principle.
Apply it and you will be amazed at the results.

You will lose nothing if you try it.

The 90-10 principle is incredible. Very few know and apply this principle. The result?

Millions of people are suffering from undeserved stress, trials, problems and heartache.
There never seem to be a success in life.
Bad days follow bad days.
Terrible things seem to be constantly happening.
There is constant stress, lack of joy, and broken relationships.

Worry consumes time.
Anger breaks friendships and life seems dreary and is not enjoyed to the fullest.
Friends are lost.
Life is a bore and often seems cruel.

Does this describe you? If so, do not be discouraged. You can be different! Understand and apply the 90/10 principle. It will change your life...

Sunday, July 06, 2003

Birthday Color Analysis

December 23rd - January 1st

January 2nd - January 11th

January 12th - January 24th

January 25th - February 3

February 4th - February 8th

February 9th - February 18th

February 19th - February 28th

March1st - Match 10th

March 11 - March 20th

March 21 st

March 22 nd - March 31st

April 1st - April 10th

April 11th - April 20th

April 21st - April 30th

May 2nd - May 14th

May 15th - May 24th

May 25th - June 3rd

June 4th - June13th

June 14 - June 23rd

June 24th

June 25 - July 4th

July 5th - July 14th

July 15th - July 25 th

July 26th - August 4 th

August 5th - August 13th

August 14th - August 23rd

August 24 - September 2nd

September 3rd - September12th

September 13th - September 22nd

September 23rd

September 24th - October 3rd

October 4th - October 13th

October 14th - October 23rd

October 24 - November 11th

November 12th - November 21st

November 22nd - December1st

December 2nd - December11th

December 12th - December 21st

December 22nd

Cute and lovable type, you are picky but always in love ...and liked to be loved. Fresh and cheerful, but can be "moody" at times. Capable with people, nice, soft, and that can love you for the way you are. Likes people that are easy to talk to, and can make you feel comfortable.

Competitive and sportive. Don't like losing and always cheerful! You are trustworthy, and very out-going. You choose love carefully, and don't fall in love easily. But once you find the right one, you don't let go for a long long time.

You are mostly interested in your looks. And have high standards in picking love. You think and make a solution precisely, and hardly make stupid mistakes. You like to lead, and is easy for you to make new friends.

You are attractive, and active. You never hide your feelings, and express everything that's inside. But can be selfish at times. You want to be noticed, and don't like to be treated unequally. You can brighten up people's day. You know what to say at the right time, and you have a good sense of humor.

You get along well with new people. You are not really a shy person, but sometimes you can hurt people's feelings by your words... You like to be loved and noticed by your lover, but mostly you are single, waiting for the right person.

You know what's right and what's wrong. You are cheerful and out going. It's hard for you to find the one you want, but once you find the right person, you won't be able to fall in love again for a long time.

You are always trying your best in everything, and like to help and care for other people. But you are not easily satisfied. You have negative thoughts, and you look for romantic love like in a fairytale.

You are sweet and innocent. Trusted by many people, and have a strong leadership towards relationships. You make good decision and make the right choice at the right time. And always dreaming of romantic relationship.

You are intelligent, and know what's right. You like to take things go your way, which can sometimes cause trouble or not thinking about other people's feelings. But you are patient when it comes to love... Once you get a hold of the right person, it's hard for you to find a better love.

You are responsible for your own actions, and you know how to treat people. You always have goals to reach, and are competitive. When it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust someone, but once you find the right friend, you trust them for ever.

You are mysterious, never selfish and get interested in things easily. Your day can be sad or happy depending on your mood. You are popular between friends but you can act stupid at times, and forget things easily. You go for person that's trustworthy.

You are calm, but easily stressed out. You get jealous easily, and complain over little things. You can't get stuck into one thing, but you have a capable personality for everyone to trust you and like you.

You are imaginative and shy, but you like trying new things. You like to challenge yourself. You learn things easily, and like "Hard to get". Your love life is normally hard and confusing.

You dream and have goals in your life. You get jealous easily and you don't react to things easily. You are different and sometimes thought highly by others.

You are warm and light hearted. You seem to flow well with friends and family. You don't like violence and know what's right. You are kind and cheerful, but don't envy other people easily.

You are active and sportive. It's hard for other people to become close with you, but you fall in love easily. But once you find out you can't get something, you give up and let go easily as well.

You have low self-esteem, and very picky. You are artistic and like to fall in love, but you let your love pass by, by loving with your mind, not your heart.

You are attractive, and love your life. You have a strong feeling towards everything. And very easily distracted. Once you get angry at someone, it's hard for you to forgive them.

Your feelings change suddenly and easily. You are always lonely, and like travelling. You are truthful, but listen and believe other people too easily. It's hard to find love for you, and you get lost in love easily. Sometimes you get hurt by love.

You are challenging, and have the "guts". But you don't like changes in your life. And once you make a decision, you keep it that way for a long time. Your love life is also challenging, and different.

You are responsible for your own actions, and you know how to treat people. You always have goals to reach, and are competitive. When it comes to friendship, you find it hard to trust someone, but once you find the right friend, you trust them for ever.

Friday, July 04, 2003

What Kind Of Friend Are U?

Your friendship must be warm and on the level. Let me put it this way, you are a fine friend and a formidable foe. With Aries, things are never done by halves. Aries expects total devotion and sincerity in friendship. In turn, he/she extends a loving and strong hand.

A good friend, though not a particularly brilliant one. Many times, family members and close relatives end up as friends. Yes, a Taurean can give himself/herself freely with time, and money, and practical advice. The Taurean likes friends, to be happy and in comfort. The Taurean hates to lose a friend, as the attachment is strong, and will often go out of the way to maintain a relationship. Taurean can be patient, persuasive, and persistent with friends.

An amusing friend and according to me a good one. Gemini can return love responds beautifully to a little appreciation. Gemini often feels-but wrongly so that others don't do enough for him/her. You're young at heart; you could be the life of a group. Whatever others might say about you, I do maintain that you excel in human relationships.

Your loyalty and attachments to people make you a friend worth his or her weight in gold. However, see that you do not expect too much out of friendship. Always ready to give, you are likely to be bitterly disappointed when friends do not live up to your own image of them. However, you will seldom cut your friendship ties and do much more for friends than they did for you. A good, solid friend!

As a friend you are worth your weight in pure gold. Leo is a mighty good friend. He/She does not ditch people. Leo is very warm and sincere. Your idealism and romanticism comes through very strongly here. Blessed is the person who has a Leo friend.

Understand, Virgo, that yours is a sign of service and communal living. It is a humane sign. Therefore, you need friends, though you may acknowledge it. In friendship, Virgo is at his best. Virgo may not be a hearty type. But Virgo will be steady and extremely reliable as a friend. Whatever advice and suggestions Virgo gives will be practical and to the point. Virgo hates to break off any relationship. A Virgo friend is a solid friend. He/She is worth the price in platinum.

You can give good advice to a friend and any friend who follows up will never come to grief. But if you expect Libra to give the heart also, you could be disillusioned. This does not mean that Libra is cold. It only means that you Librans are often detached. You can be a good friend. It only means that one should not expect the impossible from a Libra. But Libra is excellent company. Libra has finesse and grace. Let me say, Libra is the lubricant in all-human relationship.

There's explosive element here, pure dynamite, if you ask me. However good friend you may be-and you are good-do not be secretive and wear a mask. Yes you are discriminative in friendship and psychologically speaking, a disturbed family background, sometimes tragically so, is responsible for it. In friendships, you are intensely loyal. Though you do and can appear detached, you are ultra-sensitive, especially in pride and self-respect. You are a little too over-bearing, never a happy ground for a stable friendship. Secrets will be well kept. Do not attach too much importance to minor lapses on the part of friends. You could be betrayed, resulting in a complete severing of all ties.

Generous to a fault and very helpful, you evidently make a good friend. If friends follow your advice they will be happy. Yes, you can guide them very well. Your intuition comes into full play in friendship. You will do more for them than they do for you. Even if your friends fail you-and many of them will-there will be no resentment and hatred. But your own prejudices will blind you on many occasions. With Sagittarius likes and dislikes are intense.

Once the initial hurdles are crossed, you will prove to be the old faithful. See that snobbery does not come into the way of true friendship. While you may not be very tactful and polished in your manners and talk, you won't fail a friend in an emergency. Try to reach out more, please.

Aquarians can be better counselors than friends. The reason is that, though emotionally involved, they can think clearly and visualize situations and problems creatively. As yours is the sign of friendship, It do predict that your friends will receive both warmth and guidance from you.

A good friend, humane, understanding, if slightly unconventional. Yes, you can understand a person intuitively; help him without a show of exuberance. The friendship may have an unworldly touch about it. But your advice should be worth following. A word of warning. Do not expect the impossible here. People have feet of clay and so, I am afraid, do you. Accept them for what they are worth, and let not idealism crowd judgment your innate grace and diplomacy could help save an unpleasant situation.
Christy, you're a Millionaire!

Your personality is actually determined by two personality sub-types - your primary, or dominant sub-type, and your secondary sub-type. You are a Millionaire which means you are a Success / Thinker. Your primary sub-type is defined by "Success" characteristics and your secondary sub-type is defined by "Thinker" characteristics.

That means you're very ambitious and personable, and you've got a great sense of humor. Chances are you care a lot about how you look. You're bursting with self-confidence, and people admire you for your achievements and determination.

How do we know all this? How do we know that behind that bold exterior you sometimes worry that you're not good enough? Or that you can be so critical of your work that it verges on self-destructive? How could we have divined that you aim to succeed �and you'll quickly crush anyone who stands in your way?

Because while you were taking the test, you answered four different types of questions �questions that measured confidence, apprehension, willingness to take risks, and your focus on experience versus appearance �the primary traits that determine your personality. Based on your responses, we determined your personality type, Millionaire.

And that's just scratching the surface.

Personality Tests

Wednesday, July 02, 2003

Reasons why men should worship women
All this information is backed up by scientific proof.

1. Without women you will not be here today.

2. Worship women, anyone who is a woman.
Cos every woman is like your mum, don't rape a woman, unless u'r willing to rape ur own mum.

3. Women are superior to men, bcos u need more than 40 million sperms to fertilize an ovum/egg. Guys, thats quantity, not quality!!!!!!!!

4.Sperms are 75 000 times smaller than ovums.

5. Females have two x chromosomes, which carry genes. Males have only one x chromosome, and this x chromosomes come from ur mother only. Males all ur genes except ur sex come from ur mother.

6. X chromosomes bears over 2 500 genes, Y carries only 15. U have 2 485 genes less than a female.

7. A male is a biological accident. Y(male) gene is an incomplete X(female) gene.

8. In other words, the male is an incomplete female, thus a walking abortion.
(Males u r cacated)

9. From health statistics, in the past 50 years, average volume of ejaculate declined by 20%, and sperm quality is dropping.

10. There is a greater % of deformed and sluggish sperms. (Hahahaha)

11. Women are multi talented. They r now full time career women, and yet they can still run a household. Guys on the other hand come home from work, and complain.

12. Women have a higher threshold of pain, that� why GOD gave us the power to give birth and bring life into this world.

13. Women have a longer life expectancy.

14. Young men run a much greater risk than young women from dying of accidents and violence.

15. MEN are dumb, u r so interested in the females' breasts, IT'S ONLY a LUMP of FAT.

16. Females are highly specialised beings, we have two openings for pleasure and urine excretion. U guys only have ONE urethra where both sperm and urine passes.

17. And for ur extra info, urine is acidic, which makes it an unsuitable condition for sperm.

18. In the brain, testosterone is converted to estrogen, to bring about its stimulatory effects. SO listen up guys, the male hormone has to be changed into the female hormone to bring about masculinizing effects. U r not so macho without female hormones.

19. Ur mitochondria (energy source) comes from ur mother not ur father. U R more female than u think!!!!

20. Males only have testosterone and a little quantity of estrogen as sex hormones. Females have more, we have estrogen, progesterone and testosterone. Mind u we have more testosterone than u have of our estrogen.

21. There is a higher level of fatility in male foetuses.

22. The Y chromosomes of males is smaller than the X chromosome which is a female.

23. Every male is part of a female, as u carry our X chromosomes. Thus, every male is 50% female.

24. Although females are the ones who give birth and conceive, more males are likely to have a break down during pregnancy of their spouses. U GUYS R WEAK, we go through the pain, and u cry more than we do.

25. Before u r born a male, u r a female first for the first 12 weeks in ur mothers womb.

26. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. BUT behind every successful woman, is herself.

27. The males have bigger brains than women. But WOMEN use a higher % of their brains than men.

28. Women have lower risks of high cholesterol levels, than males, all thanks to our monthly periods. So women be thankful that we menstruate.

29. Many males out there keep asking for virgin brides. Honestly if u want a virgin bride, than be a virgin urself. Don't carry STD's and give it to ur virgin bride. She doesn't deserve it.

30. There are more good looking females out there than males. You can't count the number of extremely pretty women, its countless (Cindy Crawford, Aishwarya Rai, Elle Macpherson, Julia Roberts, Jenifer Lopez........). How many males can u list???
Only two in my list (my dad & Brad Pitt).

31. U find pleasure in superficial stuff (Pamela Anderson is plastic and make up)
Go Get A Life!!!

Tuesday, July 01, 2003

Sexual Stories

After a long night of making love, the young guy rolled over, pulled out a cigarette from his jeans and searched for his lighter.
Unable to find it, he asked the girl if she had one at hand. "There might be some matches in the top drawer," she replied. He opened the drawer of the bedside table and found a box of matches sitting neatly on top of a framed picture of another man. Naturally, the guy began to worry. "Is this your husband?" he inquired nervously.
"No, silly," she replied, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend then?" he asked. "No, not at all," she said, nibbling away at his ear.
"Well, who is he then?" demanded the bewildered guy. Calmly, the girl replied, "That's me before the operation."

The spark had been lost in this guy's marriage, so he was trying to think of a way to rekindle it. One night he came from work, and found his wife asleep in bed. He thought to himself, "what should I do?" "Oh-I know." He proceeded to get under the covers and go down on his wife. Soon she began to gently squirm and moan in pleasure.
After a few minutes, her body spasmed with ecstasy as she climaxed.
Afterwards, the man went straight to the bathroom to brush his teeth. When he got there, the light was on and he saw his wife there shaving her legs. He exclaimed, "What are you doing in here?!?" She said, "Shhhh!," pointing at the bed, "You'll wake your mother"

One night a guy takes his girlfriend home. As they are about to kiss each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling a little horny. With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and smiling, he says to her, "Honey, would you give me a blow job?" Horrified, she replies, "Are you mad? My parents will see us!" "Oh come on! Who's gonna see us at this hour?" He asks grinning at her. "No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?" "Oh come on! There's nobody around, they're all sleeping!" "No way. It's just too risky!" "Oh please, please, I love you so much?!?" "No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can't!" "Oh yes you can. Please?" Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl's sister shows up in her pajamas, hair disheveled, and in a sleepy voice she says, "Dad says to go ahead and give him a blow job, or I can do it. Or if need be, mom says she can come down herself and do it But for God's sake tell him to take his hand off the intercom!"

Did you know that you can tell from the skin whether a person is sexually active or not.

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shiny and skin smooth.

2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.

3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.

4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!

5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases the body endorphin into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.

6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!

7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.

8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.

9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.

10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a national antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.