Thursday, April 26, 2007

i just realised i'm not the worse-off person in the world.
of cos, i already knew that, and i bet you guys who are reading this do too, but you just don't feel it.
eventhough qihan has been boasting his 7.5k internship, i'm satisfied with my 0.75k internship. it's a whole lot of difference, but this amount may mean much more to an entire family.
yes, an entire family - you know, mom, dad, 2-3 siblings. and there's really a family like that. i was like, that's the amount i'm gonna be earning for my internship... and it can support a family?!
i was typing in information for people who applied for bursaries... there was a lot, and it made me realised how there's still a big proportion of people who are poor out there.
like this kid whose mom's a babysitter with unstable income... dad's permanently unfit for work (some neuro problems), and their family income is only 500. and then there's those who does odd jobs, with income ranging below 400, single parent. there's also people with problematic marriage, and i know because i was nosy enough to read the legal documents they have attached to their application.
maybe next time i can have a family just by doing internships.

you know how sometimes you're just supposed to do your job and don't nose too much into others' affairs? well i don't do that. if i were plainly keying in data that would be much less fun. (ok, i'm not deriving happiness out of other's miseries. like, 'hey! she got f9 in every 'o' level subjects. HAHAHA.') at least i discover something by reading them. oh well, it's not like i know those people personally. they might have crossed my paths (there's how many thousands of woodlanders!). i read everything i key - testimonials, 'a' level results, chemistry homework, and hell, even financial manuals.

still i don't become smarter like that. i just know more. heh. the bad thing is, i have such a lousy memory that it really didn't matter if i read some important stuff cos i'll probably forget it anyways.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

i was playing my silmeria halfway when i got a call from lien foundation, telling me to go for an interview at 245pm. (it was 1130am) when i told her it was a bit tight for me, she asked me to go at 2pm instead. (uh.. isn't there some kinda mathematical problem here?) she could give me 6pm, but i would probably be late, so i ended up rushing to school and reaching at 2pm. phew. and here's the most shocking information of the day: i realised i applied for the wrong interview... i wanted the 'design product and market it for the elderly', which was yong'en, but i applied for ncss - vwo database consolidation, and i have totally no idea what the hell that is. THIS IS ONE BIG SERIOUS MISTAKE. yes i know. i bet you have never seen anyone who could be clueless about what interview she's going. the lady was like 'you're a smart girl, but you're such a blur poke!' i'm thankful that she was nice enough to give me 'gentle' warnings but i think i screwed it up big time nevertheless. however, i did get to gain some insights and think about the stuff she asked (what do you plan to do after you graduate, what part of marketing do you want to do), and these questions were - well, guess what - asked again by HP. holy cow. how lucky am i.
and everyone! i think i just got my hp internship. apparently i've been called up for another interview at another hp place, and i had 1.5 hours of interview... and i think she offered me directly (congratulations, i will make you an offer for this internship - so that means i got in right?). i'm so happy now i'm up at 12.47am cos i can't sleep and i want to write a thank you letter to my interviewer. i think the road ahead will be tough though, from the way she says we gotta be self-managed (means do everything your self, 0 guidance). but hell, i'm looking forward to it! to work at hp! closest to my dream come true. i think i'm overly optimistic though. i might not be able to handle it, but who knows till you've tried? i really enjoyed my interview with her!! somehowshe just reminds me of my supervisors at morey's piers. hee. maybe that's why i did better for this interview.
i think i really gotta go sleep. i want to eat french toasts tomorrow! has been a hectic but enjoyable day. ..^_^.. i like the feeling of having done something useful.

Friday, April 20, 2007

OH YES. i got a call from HP. but it's from another department. now that i'm well-equipped with HP knowledge, i guess i wouldn't appear too stupid now, would i? and this may have been because marlinah introduced me to the marketing department? maybe the thank you letter did help after all. i can't screw it up again. NO WAY!!! i'm terrified. NOOOOOO... my luck is gonna end. it is gonna end. NOOOO.... O0o.`,
oh man!! i'm so super duper happy!! but i think this happiness is not gonna last long, cos the important papers are still at large. and the tendency is for my gpa to roll back to the original point after those grades are released. i got an A for my final exam paper for econs, and a final grade of A-. i wasn't expecting an A for the paper!!! i was only expecting a B+ for econs, and hopefully for finance and bp as well. that makes the 3rd A in a row!! wow!! i've seriously never gotten so many As in my university years. and my VERY FIRST A is from marketing research. i love sanjoy ghose man... guess all that stress and malacca trip was worth it. heh. i'm so worried about bp though. after that blur saga... now if i could just step up and grab an A+ for one of the modules somewhere in the distant future... then maybe, just maybe, i'll be able to verify that i haven't turned stupid...
oh man!! i'm so super duper happy!! but i think this happiness is not gonna last long, cos the important papers are still at large. and the tendency is for my gpa to roll back to the original point after those grades are released. i got an A for my final exam paper for econs, and a final grade of A-. i wasn't expecting an A for the paper!!! i was only expecting a B+ for econs, and hopefully for finance and bp as well. that makes the 3rd A in a row!! wow!! i've seriously never gotten so many As in my university years. and my VERY FIRST A is from marketing research. i love sanjoy ghose man... guess all that stress and malacca trip was worth it. heh. i'm so worried about bp though. after that blur saga... now if i could just step up and grab an A+ for one of the modules somewhere in the distant future... then maybe, just maybe, i'll be able to verify that i haven't turned stupid...

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Today is going to be a great day for you, Christy-Bell, especially where your love life is concerned! It is likely that you have been a bit unsure about where you stand in your current relationship. Today you will be relieved to discover just how much you are loved. Of course, as we see it, what's not to love? You have many attributes. It's no wonder you have a suitor for every one of them.

ok, that sounds good, except i didn't have a very good day aside from the fact that my exams are just over. i made another silly mistake of the century - by not reading the instructions. haiz. i should've been familiar with such processes by now, but i'm not. whoever had heard of writing workings for MCQ papers?! it's just unfathomable. definitely not in my instinct. now i just pray that i can still get marks for my unruly handwriting and seeming working kind of workings. i absolutely DO NOT want to retake this module, especially since i have already estimated a year to go, and 1 more module is just gonna take me another semestre AND drag my gpa. sighs...

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

1) screwing up my online exchange application

what i thought i did:
submitted the online application.

what i actually did:
submitted the online application in a drunken stupor. hence, it was actually not submitted at all. i was imagining things.

how did i realise what i actually did:
had a teeny 'interview' session with my prof regarding the testimonials required for this exchange. he did not receive any emails for my application to write a testimonial. so that means i had NOT submitted it at all. great.

so what i seek to resolve issue:
called person-in-charge (office of international relations). she was kind enough to send me an offline version to fill in, although she told me i did not seem keen to join in the exchange. (that's the last thing you want to hear... no interest means you're not gonna be picked for the exchange)

and the outcome:
i sent the offline application.

2) screwing up my offline application

what i thought i did:
sent the offline application the day after i received it.

what i actually did:
put the application in my draft folder.

how did i realise what i actually did:
one week later, trying to clean my mails... and voila! 'why is it still in my drafts box?'

so what i seek to resolve issue:
immediately emailed and called same person up. she says they were having some meetings and were busy the entire week. did not have time to check through the applications. so i can still send mine in. phew.

and the outcome:
expected. i didn't get my rikkyo. they offered my second choice, APU, but i have to stay there till jan. that means more school fees (money-minded, wickedly scheming school), later-than-planned graduation. oh well, guess i'll try the next semester.

3) screwing up my community service

what i thought i did:
burning up my weekends, giving to the poor, showering love to the people

what i actually did:
sell tshirts. merchandise. basically profiteering out of silat's world championship. or rather, helping some organisation to profit, since the money doesn't go to me. just to get the hours, yeah?

how did i realise what i actually did:
received an email saying 'hey, your cip hours would not be recognised cos you didn't do so-and-so-and-so...'

so what i seek to resolve issue:
ok, so i didn't sign up officially for it. i didn't submit indemnity form. so that's 2 major boo-boos. went to the office of community service, spoke to 2 representatives from there. had an hour plus of intensive interrogation in between interruptions from my dearest friend, who had exchanged her bag with me cos her bad looked too unpresentable for an interview and now she wants her bag back (try tongue twisting that, my fingers almost crossed). oh joy. finally agreed to let me have my well-deserved 38 hours if i repent by doing another day-cip. better than nothing...

and the outcome:
haven't found my cip. will continue this saga after the exams.

4) exams clashing with phantom of the opera

what i thought i did:
checked my time table, made sure i was available on that day so i can finish my exams and watch the concert.

what i actually did:
i probably imagined doing all that.

how did i realise what i actually did:
woke up this morning. 'hey why is my 14th april marked?'... 'oh it's phantom of the opera... 2-4pm'... 'wait, ain't i supposed to have my business process paper on 14th april, 130-430pm?' GREAT.

so what i seek to resolve issue:
-emailed my prof. hey i spent $100 bucks on this thing, prebooked it last year, please let me have the paper earlier??? 'that's not a good enough reason to convince the register's -it's registrar, prof- office.' expected. i'll just try to beg and beg. see how.
-called up sistic. it clashes with my exams, can you please let me change the date and time?!? MAY approve appeal. but even if they have the seats available for me to change now, i may not actually get the seats if it gets taken up by the time the appeal is approved.
-find someone to exchange with me. hi, may i know who is kind enough???

and the outcome:
still pending. i just finished calling the person in between my mom calling me and me calling my sister to ask for the booker's details (i wasn't the one who booked the tickets you know).

5) retype retype retype

for my exchange application:
filled in my application, submitted and --> connection error. so filled in application, submitted and --> connection error. yes, thank you very much, that's why i can remember what i filled in already.

for my testimonials:
filled in the necessary questions prof wanted to write me a testimonial. thought i sent it. not in my sent box. oh great. it must be my connection error. so i write it again. not in my drafts either. great! prof says he didn't receive it at all! let's write it a third time.

for this blog post:
filled in my list of misfortunate misfortune. clicked 'save'. 'oopsy! you do not have the permission!' <--seriously, what's that!!! why do i need permission to blog in my own bebo?!?!?! so i have to retype all this shit and yet again remind myself of my miserable plight. and i'm so gonna copy and paste this somewhere first before the same warning comes out again. you know this got through if you see it posted now. and i will only have to write this TWICE.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Within Temptation - What Have You Done

Would you mind if I hurt you?
Understand that I need to
Wish that I had other choices
than to harm the one I love

What have you done now!

I know I’d better stop trying
You know that there’s no denying
I won’t show mercy on you now
I know, should stop believing
I know, there’s no retrieving
It’s over now, what have you done?

What have you done now!

I , I’ve been waiting for someone like you
But now you are slipping away ...oh
Why, why does fate make us suffer?
There’s a curse between us, between me and you

What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done now!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done now!

Would you mind if I killed you?
Would you mind if I tried to?
Cause you have turned into my worst enemy
You carry hate that I don’t feel
It’s over now
What you done?

What have you done now!

I , I’ve been waiting for someone like you
But now you are slipping away...oh What have you done now!
Why, why does fate make us suffer?
There’s a curse between us, between me and you

What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done now!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done! What have you done!
What have you done now!
What have you done now, What have you done?...

I will not fall, won’t let it go
We will be free when it ends

I, I’ve been waiting for someone like you
But now you are slipping away ...oh What have you done now!
Why, why does fate make us suffer
There’s a curse between us, between me and you

I, I’ve been waiting for someone like you
But now you are slipping away ...oh What have you done now!
Why, why does fate make us suffer
There’s a curse between us, between me and you
An event that you might not even be aware of, Christy-Bell, could trigger the release of some long-buried emotions from the past. Images you thought you'd forgotten could emerge from your unconscious. Don't be surprised if you even shed a few tears, and then chide yourself for being ridiculous. Don't! This is a healthy development, and could result in your feeling as if a ten-ton weight had been lifted off your shoulders. Relax, let it come, and go with the flow.

well... probably tears of happiness.

Monday, April 02, 2007