it was a looong wait as we got startled at every phone call, thinking it might be from the NICU. we couldn't stay near the hospital because there was no one taking care of our FIL at night. in fact, there was one night where he broke out in sweat in the kitchen and he shouted for nampyeon weakly. thankfully i heard it and nampyeon was able to administer his insulin in time, as his blood sugar level was very low. we prayed that minzy would get through these few days.
Minzy didn't let us down. we called the hospital before our visit - since i had to be there for my post-delivery blood test - and was told Minzy was stabilizing. they were already reducing her blood pressure medicine.
we dropped by around 10+am for my blood test, and a post-consultation with my doctor-in-charge. i almost teared when the doctor asked how my baby was doing doing pre-analysis, but i held myself well. after he took down my concerns, we met with the main doctor. he had analysed my placenta and commented that the infection rate for both minzy and linzy wasn't high, and there was no link that suggests it led to the fungal infection minzy has now (as opposed to what the doctors at nicu had suggested). the infection rate was higher for minzy than linzy. still it doesn't mean that there was no link at all. he also took a sample of my vagina secretion for cancer test. he said that since i didn't tear my vagina during the delivery, my recovery was much faster, and i am now able to go back to my 'normal' life - confinement over, able to go into water, able to exercise etc.
it was all great news for me, but i was still feeling terrible at heart.
when we dropped by, minzy was blinking and her eyes shifted here and there. i was suddenly so excited - i thought she could see me when she looked like she was looking at me. in fact, nampyeon said that minzy's so small she probably wouldn't see anything even if she looked like she was looking at me. she was moving her right arm and leg this time, and i heaved a sigh of relief as there was a period of time we thought half of her might be paralysed. her ears were still bloated and so was the right side of her neck. this time, we noticed that she was generating a lot of saliva as she kept making saliva bubbles. it was actually very cute. her hands and feet was so tiny and it was making so much movements that i fell in love with minzy all over again. she was so, so cute. even nampyeon said that she was very cute (but then he's not sure if she will be pretty =_=). the nurse went to wipe it off gently and minzy struggled a little. she then used her finger to stroke minzy's forehead, saying that 'it's ok.. it's ok...'. i was so envious of the nurse. i want to touch minzy and tell her that it's ok (except that it's really not) as well. i want to hug her and hold her little hands T_T
there were 2 doctors who came in to check her bowel movements while i was there. there were 3 little poop (which by the way look like some bugs) in her PU bag and the doctors were using their gloved fingers to shift it away from the intestines. they pressed on the intestines a couple of times and i was worried minzy might be pained from all that organ touching. the nurse assured me that there it was not painful and it was ok to touch the intestines like that. okay.
since she was over the critical 3 day period, the doctors still commented that she would have to make it past 1 week for her to be really stable (even so, how stable could NICU babies be...). her infection was dropping and her blood pressure etc was all stabilizing. it was really good news. she was able to pass urine and faeces normally now. she still had slight bleeding in her brains, but the focus now was really the candida infection.
i was able to take a lot of videos and pictures of her now that she was doing better. i was so glad and happy. nampyeon took many more too - he even took zoomed-in videos of her hands and her feet moving individually XD
i couldn't bear to leave this cute little thing when our visit was over. we had a nice shabu lunch/dinner before heading home.
i didn't think we would finish those vege and that large pile of beansprout... but we did!
anyway... back at home... i thought i should also remember this. everytime they print the labels for my milk, i feel a sense of satisfaction as the days increase. Minzy started eating again today. She was day 24, and i hope she will have many many more happy days to come.
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