The doctor called nampyeon urgently yesterday, saying that Minzy needed immediate surgery as the medicine wasn't closing up the open vessel. Nampyeon happened to be in the hospital just then since he was delivering the colostrum, and he signed the papers to agree to the surgery.
even though the doctor told us that it was one of the simplest surgery for preemies, we still couldn't help but worry. the lightest baby he had ever operated on was only 500g but Minzy was 490g and she dropped to 460g in the morning of the surgery. the vessel either has to be cut off or tied up, depending on whichever is feasible once the doctor opens her up. the worst thing that could happen is a big scar that would remain with her for life. nampyeon thought that surgery was also the best option as the medicine given to close the vessels were not good for the baby and the surgery may help to stop the brain bleeding as well. the doctor was saying how we would not be able to see her after the surgery and we should do so before the surgery today. we had to be there by 9am to see her, since the surgery was at 10am.
we woke up early and went to see Minzy. she had a new needle on her left hand to prep for the surgery. i ached at how this little baby have to go under the knife when she's barely 500g. i told her to be strong and that i would come see her after her surgery ends. the doctor says it will take at most 3 hours.
while waiting, we decided to walk around hyehwa and have lunch. i was actually glad that i came out to see Minzy, since this gave me a chance to finally have a breath of fresh air outside. it was probably the first time i was out having a 'date' with nampyeon since i was hospitalised.
we rested at a tart cafe, had great food at witch's kitchen and i even managed to buy myself harry potter collaboration accessories from OST.
i felt a little guilty for being happy for once but i was also relieved that my mood could be lifted from such simple things. the only thing that was inconvenient was having to pump every 3 hours and i ended up doing it at the restaurant. thankfully it was dimly lit and there was only 2 other tables with guests so i could do it unnoticed.
we went back around 2pm as nampyeon said the surgery was at 11am. we didn't receive any calls and were pretty worried so we decided to just head back and check ourselves. thankfully the surgery went well! the doctor said that Minzy's blood pressure was stable throughout and she would only need to focus on recovery now. there was big patch on the left side of her body where she was cut that has a tube connected to it to drain the carbon dioxide accumulated during surgery, and the needle on her left hand drained 'dirtied' blood. it would be removed as soon as the things that were supposed to come out and cleaned up. the doctor says she won't be able to eat for a few days depending on her condition, and she was safe for now. she was sleeping and her left hand occasionally twitched. Minzy is such a strong, strong baby. mommy is proud.
outside, we met a mom whose twins were scheduled for the same surgery just after Minzy. she gave birth at 23+6 weeks, the same as me, but her twins weighed more than 600g. she mentioned that the heavier weight was because they weren't able to pee properly. she looked like she was the same age as me but she was 50 years old! we assured her that since Minzy's surgery went well, her twins would have no trouble, and chatted a little on how we both delivered way earlier than expected. she was only hospitalised for 4-5days and her lungs filled with water when she was given magnesium, thus she had to deliver since the drips didn't work. being in the same unfortunate situation, it actually felt quite nice to have someone in a similar situation and being able to talk about it casually.
however, Minzy's trials were not over. nampyeon told me that while her brain bleeding stopped, it was actually in stage 4 and we would have to brace ourselves for possibility of cerebral palsy in the future, which can only be determined when she turns one or two. additionally, she still has a fungal (candida) infection that's not resolved, and would have to be on antibiotics. babies on antibiotics are not really a great thing because they might turn immune to it in the future since they are given the drugs when they are so young.
i think, heaven is punishing my baby for the sins i committed...
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